When it comes to dynamics in relationships that cause problems and a fair amount of frustration, there are two common patterns of behaviour. One of those is when one is attracted to people who are unavailable. So they desire to be another person and yet continually end up being attracted to people who are not there for them.

This is going to create one set of challenges, and what will create another is when one attracts people who are needy. Here, one will end up attracting people who want so much and more than they can or are prepared to give.

And while there can be other relationship challenges that people can have, these two are very common in today’s world. Therefore if one has faced these challenges in their own life or still is, it is not something that should be taken to heart.

The Current State

It is just a reflection of where society is in general and not simply limited to a few individuals here and there. Numerous people on this planet are going through the same challenges at this time. When one has a problem in their life, it is easy to come to the conclusion that they are the only ones who have it.

And this can cause one to feel victimised and hard done by. When in reality, it is not limited to them and something other people are also trying to handle. Realising this can make it easier and stop one from feeling added pressure and stress.


When one has a pattern of attracting people who are unavailable for instance, it doesn’t mean that this is the case on the odd occasion. It is going to be a way of life for them and due to this, one has a reason to feel aggravated.

And if one has a pattern of attracting people who are needy, it is not that these people have needs that are the problem. Everyone on this planet has needs and that is not something to feel ashamed of or weak.

This is a natural part of being human and this can’t be changed or removed. But there is a clear difference between someone who has needs and someone who is needy.


This is likely to cause someone to behave in ways that are overwhelming; cause one to feel smothered and trapped for example. And even though one could go along with this for a while or have set times when they do, it won’t be enough for this person.

Their neediness will never end, no matter how much one gives into it. These needs are insatiable and unable to be met by another human being. At first, one might appreciate this kind of behaviour and feel loved, valued and important.

However, as time goes by, what was enjoyable soon becomes frustrating and annoying. And if this type of behaviour doesn’t appear from the beginning, then it could come out once they feel comfortable enough to reveal this part of themselves.


There is going to be all kinds of ways that another’s neediness can appear and some of these will be subtle, while others will be highly visible. This could range from them wanting to see one all the time, constantly messaging or calling and basically not wanting one to leave from their sight.

These are just a few examples and there are inevitably going to be many others. But regardless of what a person does who is needy, they are going to cause one to feel compromised and even smothered.

A Deeper Look

On one side there is someone who is needy and it is clear that they have some work to do on themselves. They are acting in ways that are similar to how a baby would behave around their primary caregiver. To ignore their physical age and to focus on their level of emotional development would soon show that they haven’t grown up.

But while it can seem as though one person is superior to another here and that one is more evolved, this is often far from the truth. Relationships are symbiotic and therefore if one person has issues, the other person also does. If there wasn’t a match somewhere they wouldn’t have been drawn together.

Adaptive Behaviour

What stops this from being realised is when one person is caught up in their history and the other has created different coping mechanism and adaptive behaviour to create the illusion of having no problems.

The Disconnection

And when one has a pattern of attracting needy people into their life, there is a good chance that this person has rejected and denied their needy side. The other person is fully embracing their needy side and this person has become disconnected from it.

The reason why one is so affected by this behaviour is because it reminds them of their own needy side. This is likely to be a side that they feel shamed of for having and would feel incredibly vulnerable should they show it.

So these people are messengers and are mirroring back what one has covered up and neglected for so long. Whilst the other person needs to become more self-reliant, it is likely that one needs to become more interdependent.

Looking Within

Until one looks within and faces their needy side, they will continue to be attracted to and attract people who are needy. One may have learnt at a very early age that having needs was not safe and so they have spent the rest of their life pretending that they don’t have any.

If they were to get in touch with these needs as an adult, they could end up feeling out of control and overwhelmed by them. This can be the result of one having trapped emotions and feelings that started to build up when they were a baby and continued throughout their childhood and adult years. One could also switch between being needless or needy depending on the situation.


Needs are not something to feel ashamed of for having or that one is less than for having them. If one has trouble not only admitting to others but also themselves that they have needs, then it might be necessary to seek some kind of assistance.

Author’s Bio: 

Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include “A Dialogue With The Heart” and “Communication Made Easy.”

How come Co-dependence arise? Mainly because several people make an unconscious contract with one another to try and fulfill the unmet needs from the other. Initially, mainly in the situation of the couple, this contract is understood to be “love”. For example, the number of occasions have you ever heard yourself …

Your rating: None Average: 2 (1 election)

Are you aware that the damaged heart from the formerly unsuccessful relationship is among the finest road blocks to some) getting another relationship and b) getting a effective relationship? Are you aware it is because the discomfort connected using the damaged heart never really disappears it just will get hidden and stays ever present being an emotional threat waiting to obtain re-triggered?

Are you aware which makes one feel vulnerable, afraid, insecure, untrusting, and not able to really be authentic and intimate with a brand new partner?

Finally, are you aware the only efficient way to really mend a damaged heart would be to permanently and completely erase the negative memory from the unsuccessful relationship? Want to understand more about why this really is now possible?

Sadly these items never really disappears rather it is constantly on the manifest later on encounters with other people as:

Plus much more.

When I’m sure you can observe this could seriously damage one’s ability to achieve their relationship existence. Because of this , that a lot of people end up going in one unsuccessful relationship to a different. That old “scars” become a real and permanent wedge stopping them from fulfilling this specific desire.

The important question now’s can anything truly be achieved to erase/remove individuals old scars for good?

Should you understand the character from the problem You’ll observe that complete deletion from the memory and it is connected discomfort is really the only solution as simply which will take away the threat.

About ten years ago it had been learned that negative reminiscences might be quickly, easily and completely removed to the stage the person holding them felt as though they never really happened. This meant that certain’s existence could effectively start anew on the neat and new slate.

Let’s focus on most this might be hard to fathom because it is not really a common human experience. What’s been learned however is the fact that by removing such negative reminiscences not just may be the person freed up from the specter of re-emerging old discomfort they’re also literally cut back to existence. Exactly what do I am talking about with this, you request?

Quite simply they’re there to literally to kill you! So when they’re removed you find that Existence Pressure Energy automatically returns towards the mind/body and also the person comes progressively to existence and feels continuously more empowered.

This then brings within the re-emergence from the self assured and psychologically independent Authentic Self that can resiliently and with confidence enter new associations.

So if you’re certainly one of individuals people whose relationship existence remains stuck because of old painful feelings of heartbreak and you want to become free kindly visit the site below where one can request a totally free opening telephone/Skype consultation of the effective new training procedure that will start to get you there.

Author’s Bio: 

Nick Arrizza, an old Mental health specialist and Physician, is definitely an Worldwide Expert Self Empowerment Existence Coach, Relationship and Spiritual Tele-Coach, Author and also the developer from the effective Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

A Totally Free one hour Opening MRP Telephone/Skype Training Consultation And Free Copy of My E-book can be found upon request (You’ll be requested to pay for your personal lengthy distance telephone charges)

Are you aware that lots of people who’re being released of the unhealthy relationship situation frequently end up rapidly re-entering similar negative and frequently abusive associations? Are you aware this pattern is basically driven by feelings of rejection, abandonment, low self worth, low self …

Are you currently coming off a poor relationship? Still feeling the emotional wounds out of your ex? Have you got old deeply hidden wounds from formerly unsuccessful associations? Well should you’ve clarified yes to any kind of these i quickly can promise these scars will, regardless of whether you enjoy it or otherwise, …

Yes, it may happen to you—the date using the guy you usually wanted. But don&rsquot enable your enthusiasm compromise your safety. Get wise and go ahead and take following safeguards in advance. How you can Safeguard your Safety on Dates 1. Tell Buddies and Family.&nbspLet your …

The Myth of Elderly Care

There are no easy answers to providing for the needs of the elderly. Despite the voluble rhetoric of politicians we appear to be making no progress.

The bottom line is that there is not enough money in the medical or taxation system to pay for the standard of care that we are theoretically capable of providing. The question is what is the reasonable standard we should aim towards for the majority of the population? We cannot continue as we are-stabbing in the dark and hoping a solution will miraculously occur. Our parents- and one day all of us – will suffer from this inaction.

The greatest tragedy though is what goes on behind closed doors of aged care. Frail and incapacitated people develop ugly and painful bedsores… bone exposed amid loose and rotting flesh..people are sedated to make them more accommodating to nursing home staff..
basic infections are being missed- simply because no one cares enough to check intimate hygiene. These are the small incidents that make the technological standards we have attained in other areas of medicine look pathetic.

We don’t have a focus on global ‘caring’ and that is what mocks our wonderful healthcare standards.

The medical treatment for elderly in nursing and respite homes is often subjugated by overuse of medicines and elaborate investigations over basic nursing. Even the best infrastructure does not translate to proper care for inhabitants. Because ‘care’ is not clearly defined and quantified- it does not get measured or adequately valued and the overall response of patients declines.

Author’s Bio: 

Dr Jean Yarrow is a UK based Australian doctor with a special interest in the creation of a better society as we all mature

Unless of course you’ll be able to erase the memory from the event from inside the mindOrphysique for good. The thing is that memory and it is connected feelings “is” the wound or scar.

Now because all of us believe and believe that yesteryear can’t be transformed once it’s occurred it ‘s obvious that it’ll remain along with you throughout your existence.

Yes, I understand that practitioners will inform (and have said) that you could arrange it through to ensure that it doesn’t feel badly because the original event. Is that this however really true?

It absolutely was my experience the wound really can’t ever be mended, within the true feeling of the term. It is because “mending” when i stated above suggests literally removing the memory from your mind/body completely which is recognized as reasonably impossible (or perhaps is it).

If this isn’t done you could return to it and re-stimulate individuals old negativity. The truth that they might not be as potent as before doesn’t mean situations are better. Actually it really implies that they’re in this way worse since the negativity have grown to be “walled off” right into a much deeper subconscious chamber of awareness. That’s they’ve be unconscious.

At these times these deeper held feelings become “physical” causes of irritation or disturbance that then have the possibility to result in “physical” degeneration and illness. It is indeed my personal view that negative reminiscences are at the bottom of such illness.

So getting stated i reassert, the extraction/erasure of the particular reminiscences is important to totally healing a damaged heart and rebuilding, indeed improving, one’s full relationship potential.

To understand more about removing negative reminiscences, healing a damaged heart and asking for a major experience kindly visit the url below.

Author’s Bio: 

Nick Arrizza, an old Mental health specialist and Physician, is definitely an Worldwide Expert Self Empowerment Existence Coach, Relationship and Spiritual Tele-Coach, Author and also the developer from the effective Mind Resonance Process® (MRP).

A Totally Free one hour Opening MRP Telephone/Skype Training Consultation And Free Copy of My E-book can be found upon request (You’ll be requested to pay for your personal lengthy distance telephone charges)

Your rating: None Average: 1.5 (2 votes)

Dear Reader:

Author’s Bio: 

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. is a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with over 30 years experience in counseling individuals and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction; The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again; Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her newest, Love Styles: How to Celebrate Your Differences. She writes the “Dr. Romance” blog, and the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email newsletter.

Dr. Tessina, is CRO (Chief Romance Officer) for LoveForever.com, a website designed to strengthen relationships and guide couples through the various stages of their relationship with personalized tips, courses, and online couples counseling. Online, she’s known as “Dr. Romance” Dr. Tessina appears frequently on radio, and such TV shows as “Oprah”, “Larry King Live” and ABC News.

Number Seven Might Be Just A Little Shocking

1. What’s your meaning of commitment?
Whether long or otherwise, you and your spouse are continuously determining your relationship. Should you don’t understand what your relationship way to you both, you risk repeating past mistakes, getting stuck in uncomfortable roles, or fighting by what a proper relationship is. Discuss that which you mean by words for example relationship, commitment, love, and loyalty. You’ll be blown away in what you learn.

6. How can you show like to one another?
Speaking about which actions and words mean like to you might be surprising. Even when it’s hard that you should determine, talking about the way you give and receive love will enhance your relationship. You’ll learn why is you both feel loved, and just how to convey your ex effectively.

7. How good have you discuss these very questions?
Asking her these questions are fantastic tests of the capability to define and exercise problems. Constructive discussion that results in a mutually acceptable solution means you are aware how to resolve problems inside your relationship. Otherwise, get counseling prior to going further.

Remaining TOGETHER

Author’s Bio: 

Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. is really a licensed psychotherapist in S. California since 1978 with more than 3 decades experience of counseling people and couples and author of 13 books in 17 languages, including It Finishes Along With You: Develop and From Disorder The Unofficial Help guide to Dating Again Money, Sex and youngsters: Stop Fighting Concerning the Three Stuff That Can Ruin Your Marriage, The Commuter Marriage, and her latest, Love Styles: How you can Celebrate Your Variations. She creates the “Dr. Romance” blog, and also the “Happiness Tips from Tina” email e-newsletter.

Dr. Tessina, is CRO (Chief Romance Officer) for LoveForever.com, an internet site made to strengthen associations and guide couples with the various stages of the relationship with personalized tips, courses, an internet-based couples counseling. Online, she’s referred to as “Dr. Romance” Dr. Tessina seems frequently on radio, and the like Television shows as “Oprah”, “Larry King Live” and ABC News.